Turning a year older can be tough. Fortunately, we can lean on friends to offer moral support as we navigate difficult milestones such as birthdays.
Just kidding, of course. Most friends prefer to rub it in, especially if the one turning a year older is a guy. Birthday wishes for an older man ā however you want to define āolderā ā can be downright brutal. In fact, phrases like āold fartā and āold bastardā are par for the course with this sort of birthday message.
If you're looking to give a male friend a good ribbing on his birthday, we have just the list for you. In fact, we have more funny wording ideas than he can shake his elderly fist at. So, without further ado, here are 21 uniquely humorous ways to say āHappy Birthday, old man!ā
ā¢ Happy Birthday to someone who deserves to be treasured. After all, fossils of your era are hard to find.
ā¢ Happy Birthday, old fart. There's just one thing I want to know. What did they put on top of your birthday cake before the invention of fire?
ā¢ I heard you were middle-agedā¦ as in, born in the Middle Ages. Happy Birthday, ye olde farte.
ā¢ Everything gets harder when you get olderā¦ except for your penis, of course. Happy Birthday, you old softy.
ā¢ Welcome to the curmudgeonly years, you crusty old bastard you.
ā¢ Happy Birthday to a relic from a bygone era.
ā¢ I was going to make fun of you on your birthday. Fortunately for you, I was taught to respect my elders.
ā¢ Better to be an old fart than a dumb ass. Happy Birthday!
ā¢ Birthdays suck when you're old, but at least you don't have too many more to go.
ā¢ Happy Birthday, old man. Hope you have an exciting birthday celebrationā¦ followed by a nice, long nap.
ā¢ Happy Birthday, old fart. Hope your birthday doesn't stink.
ā¢ Relax, old man. You survived disco. You can survive another birthday.
ā¢ Happy Birthday, old fart. What's that, you couldn't hear me? HAPPY BIRTHDAY, OLD FART!
ā¢ You know how guys get better looking with age? Yeah, that doesn't last forever. Happy Birthday, you sexy old bastard.
ā¢ Happy Birthday, old man. Now might be a good time to stop acting your age.
ā¢ They say that with age comes wisdom. You must be the exception that proves the rule. Happy Birthday to an exceptional old guy.
ā¢ Congratulations! After years of seasoning, you're officially a salty old bastard.
ā¢ Your birthday is one of my favorite days of the year. It reminds me that you will always be older than me.
ā¢ They say you can't teach an old dog new tricks. That's because old dogs already know all the tricks. Happy Birthday, dawg.
ā¢ You're at an age where you no longer give a shit. Heck, at your age, you're happy when you can take a shit.
ā¢ You know what an old fart is? It's when you say you're 35 and it doesn't pass the smell test.
Hope you enjoyed these birthday wishes for old farts. Just remember that what comes around, goes around. You can expect similarly harsh (and hilarious) treatment when your own birthday arrives.
Birthday Poems
Share our birthday poems with that someone special who is celebrating their birthday. When just a Happy Birthday is not enough why not share a verse or two. The messages in these poems are inspiring, and encouraging.Birthdays are a day to be recognized and celebrated. It is one thing that we all have in common. And while some people regret the years passing by, others look forward to what the new year brings. Let these verses bring well wishes and happiness to celebrate the day!
Another Year
Another year has passed
A birthday for you is in store
May you find this coming year
Be one with lots of open doors.
Follow your dreams
Remember you can achieve
All that you dream
Whatever your mind can conceive
So this poems brings
wishes for you
in hopes that the coming year
is filled with things you love to do.
A Heartfelt Wish
This heartfelt wish is just for you
Today is your special day
May all the dreams you do pursue
Be realized in every way.
A special person you are to me
You deserve the best of everything
So may this birthday and the coming year be
One that offers you the best that life may bring.
Wishing You
Wishing you much happiness, dear
On this special day
And for the coming year
May blessings come your way.
Be thankful for each day you have
Thank God in heaven above
Fill your life with happy not sad
Remember you are loved.
We Want You To Know
Happiness you do bring
To those who love you so
If we could give you anything
We want you to know:
We wish much happiness for you
In everything you do.
And always remember we love you
No matter what you do
May all your wishes come true this year
Because to us you are very dear.
A Birthday Wish
This Birthday wish is just for you,
And I hope it comes true:
B e yourself, we love and appreciate you
I magine and achieve all you can be
R elax this day and celebrate another year
T ake time to look after you, you are so dear
H umor, never lose your sense of humor
D etermination you do have that great quality
A ttitude, yours is positive and felt by others
Y esterday is gone, tomorrow is not here, live today and enjoy the year.
Time Goes By
The years go by so fast
It seems like only yesterday
We had a birthday splash
And now a full year has again gone past.
Time goes by and then we see
How the years just seem to fly by
I know that you agree with me
It is a fact of life we can't deny
So live this year
Be all that you can be
As we will turn around
And next year will be here.
The Passing Years
Poet: Edward Tuck
Age is a quality of mind:
If you have left your dreams behind,
If hope is lost,
If you no longer look ahead,
If your ambition's fires are dead,
Then you are old.
But if from life you take the best
And if in life you keep the jest,
If love you hold,
No matter how the years go by,
No matter how the birthdays fly,
You are not old.
Here Is A Wish
Poet: John McLeod
Here is a wish that says:
Warm, happy hours be yours
Shadows are of passing note
But healing laughter cures.
Be, therefore, ever joyful, Friend,
And walk on gladsome feet
Towards tomorrow's brand new dawn
And promise sweet!
Hard To Believe
It's hard to believe you are celebrating another birthday
It was only yesterday your life was full of play
Now here you are with accomplishments in life
And your attitude is one without strife
We are so proud of you
We wish you success in all you do.
So on this day we wish you well
We think you are special and oh, how swell!
As I Grow Old
Poet: Arnold West
God, keep my heart attuned to laughter
when youth is done;
when all the days are gray days, coming after
The warmth, the sun.
God keep me then from bitterness, from
grieving,
When life seems cold;
God keep me always loving and believing
As I grow old.
Another Year
Another birthday, another year
May you have problems that disappear
May you have health
And a bit of wealth
May you share
With those who care
May the coming year
Be one of good cheer.
Age Is Not To Be Feared
Another birthday, another year
Remember though that age is not to be feared
You are just achieving your prime
Here's to your health and living a long time
As they say, be happy, don't worry
Enjoy your life and don't be in a hurry
We take this opportunity to wish you
Happiness in all you do.
We appreciate your caring
Your always willingness for sharing
Thank you, for being you
We love you and all you do.
The Happiest Age
Poet: Wilhelmina Stitch
What age is happiest?
Had you asked me,
I would have made this plea:
the Now is best.
What joy to live with zest each newborn day;
and from the Moment wrest what Life will give away.
The Past is but a guest who came and went,
and left this one behest: to be content.
Think how To-day is blest!
We've eyes to see Nature in Beauty drest for you, for me.
What matter that the crest of Youth is past.
Youth lives within the breast with joys that last.
The will to do our best, and hands for giving.
Oh! Now's the happiest, best time for living!
What age is happiest?
Oh! hear my vow, for I have put the test -
the happiest's Now.
Sweet sighs and kindly jest for warmth and cheer;
and Love's most high bequest to crown the year.
Aging
I think of aging as a gift, a privilege to enjoy,
Not as space or empty time thatās easy to destroy.
Years of toil are history now, your strength is almost spent,
But all the days still left to you are surely heaven sent.
You now have time to reminisce, to think of years gone by;
Remembering all the things you've done and now you wonder "Why?"
You stop and think and want to know why youth so quickly flew,
Time then was brief, just fleeting by; so much left up to you.
And now your family's grown and gone, they're scattered, far away;
And as you ponder on the past you feel alone each day.
But I know one sweet promise to those who are God's own,
āIāll always walk beside you, youāre never left alone."
Your prayers aren't left unanswered, there's still much you can do;
Consider interceding for folks who need Him too.
When folks feel lost and lonely, greet them with a smile,
And give them the assurance that life is still worthwhile.
You're still here for a reason, so do the best you can;
You have God-given talents that fit into His plan.
Happy Birthday Poems
Thinking Of YouThinking of you today with love
Your a special person who gives us much pleasure
We thank God above
As He sent us a special treasure.
May this year bring you
Success and happiness in all you do
A very Happy Birthday
Is our wish for you!
A Very Happy Birthday
A very Happy Birthday to you
Don't let your age make you feel blue
Another year older and wiser you are
You should feel like a shining star.
Age is just a number you see
What's important is for you to be
Loving and living each day with glee
And celebrating for all to see.
So be happy with this special day
We hope this card which is sent your way
Will make you realize you lucky you are
To have live your life so long this far.
Best wishes and kisses we do send
Over the miles and around the bend
A happy, happy day to you
We are celebrating with you too.
The Best of Birthdays
Wishing you the best of birthdays
May the coming year be special in all ways
Your age makes us realize how time has flew
It was just like yesterday that you were two.
We wish you happiness and health
And never forget that the important things are not wealth
Be happy don't be blue
Happy Birthday, we love you.
Happy Birthday
My wish for you on this special day
Is that the coming year goes well
And may life treat you great in all the ways
That my wishes and words can't tell.
Behind you now is yesterday
Let your experience and knowledge pave the way
Here's to you and to your success
We know you will give it your best.
So happy, happy birthday
We wish you many more
and on this day to you we say
We know life has good things in store
Wishing You
Here is a birthday wish for you
One that is loving, happy and true
A wish for happiness and best things
The coming year to you will bring.
Today I am wishing you a very Happy Birthday
A day filled with every pleasure
And may your future be as happy
As all the memories you treasure.
My Sister
My sister, my friend it's your birthday today
I send you this verse on this, a special day:
Roses are red, violets are blue
A very Happy Birthday is wished for you!
More Happy Birthday Sister Poems
Funny Birthday Poems
To AgePoet: Unknown
To age to age! Why does anyone care?
As the wrinkles grow longer,
And grey graces your hair.
Life should be simple,
Because when push comes to shove,
The only one counting is the good Lord above!
Candles
Poet: Unknown
Metallic Age
Poet: Unknown
To the "metallic" age
Gold in our teeth,
Silver in our hair,
And lead in our pants.
Another candle on your cake?
Well, that's no cause to pout.
Be glad that you have strength enough
To blow the candle out!
Funny Birthday Quotes
Short Birthday Poems
Another year older,Just look at it this way.
You're only one day older,
Than you were yesterday.
Poet Unknown
Happy birthday to you,
And many to be,
With friends who are true,
As you are to me.
Poet Unknown
We wish you joy on your birthday,
And all the whole year through.
For all the best that life can hold,
Is none to good for you.
Poet Unknown
Helen Rowland
"What most persons consider as virtue, after the age of 40 is simply a loss of energy."
"At the age of twenty, we don't care what the world thinks of us; at thirty, we worry about what it is thinking of us; at forty, we discover that it wasn't thinking of us at all."
Helen Rowland
"Life begins on your 40th birthday. But so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times."
"Every man over forty is a scoundrel."
Edward Young
"Be wise with speed; a fool at forty is a fool indeed."
French Proverb
"Forty is the old age of youth; fifty is the youth of old age."
Cicero
"This wine is forty years old. It certainly doesn't show its age."
(Latin: Hoc vinum Falernum annorum quadragenta est. Bene aetatem fert.)
Colleen McCullough
"The lovely thing about being forty is that you can appreciate twenty-five-year-old men."
"When I passed forty I dropped pretense, 'cause men like women who got some sense."
Laura Randolph
"If life really begins on your 40th birthday, it's because that's when women finally get itā¦ the guts to take back their lives."
James Thurber
"Women deserve to have more than twelve years between the ages of twenty eight and forty."
Samuel Beckett
"To think, when one is no longer young, when one is not yet old, that one is no longer young, that one is not yet old, that is perhaps something."
W. B. Pitkin
"Life begins at forty."
30th birthday wishes: Turning thirty is a confusing juncture of life. It can be dreadful enough to make people feel that they are finally not young any more. At the same time, it can motivate people to start living their lives the fullest. This is where all the inspirational quotes, sarcasm, funny messages and jokes come in. Whether it is for your husband, wife, girlfriend, boyfriend, colleague, friend or a loved one ā say Happy Birthday with a special message that celebrates this baffling life phase. From a sweet note that shows lifeās brighter side to cute ones that poke fun at the age factor ā do your bit to bring a smile on the newest thirty year old on the block.
1) Stop worrying about whatās gone by. Start celebrating what lies ahead. Happy birthday.
2) The best part about being thirty is that there are no uncertainties in life. You are sure that itās all going to go downhill from here. Happy 30th birthday.
3) When you were twenty, you felt like growing up and becoming thirty. When you will be forty, you will wish you could go back to being thirty. So to conclude, being thirty is just perfect. Happy birthday.
4) Congratulations for turning thirty. From here on, life is less about knowing how old you are and more about believing how young you feel. Happy birthday.
5) At thirteen, you were officially a teenager. At twenty one, you were officially an adult. But at thirty, you are unofficially old. Happy 30th birthday.
6) Life is too short to be lived counting the years. Just enjoy the ride and make awesome memories. Happy birthday.
7) There is one thing worth looking forward to when you turn thirty ā you are almost halfway to retirement benefits. Happy birthday.
8) The secret of being happy in your thirties is quite simple ā take each day as it comes. Happy birthday.
9) Your body may have turned thirty today but the way you look like a hot twenty one year old suggests that your beauty will never be able to catch up with your age. Happy 30th birthday.
10) The countdown to your midlife crisis has just begun. Tick tock tick tock. Happy 30th birthday.
11) Live life doing what YOU love, not what impresses others. Happy birthday.
12) Farewell to your youth ā it was good while it lasted. Happy 30th.
13) Turning thirty is lifeās way of telling you that the most beautiful phase of your life has just begun. Happy 30th birthday.
14) If you werenāt my best friend, I would tell you how dreadful it is to turn thirty. But since you are, I donāt want to spoil the party. Happy birthday.
15) Turning thirty gives you the perfect birdās eye view of your life. You know exactly what mistakes you made in the past and exactly how to correct them in the future. Happy 30th birthday.
16) It doesnāt matter how you have lived your life so far. What matters is how you are going to live it from now on. Happy 30th birthday.
17) Stop worrying about your age. There will be many other problems to worry about in life after you turn thirty. Happy birthday.
18) Nothing changes when you cross thirty except that you have to replace your moisturizer with an anti-aging cream. Happy birthday.
19) Thirty is the time to really start living your life to the fullest, so that by the time you are old you would have experienced lifeās best. Happy 30th.
20) Life before thirty is for making mistakes and life after thirty is to repent for all of them. Happy birthday.
21) Look back on regrets and laugh them off, look forward to your dreams and pursue them with all your heart. Happy birthday.
23) Being thirty is when you can be an adult in the world of youngsters who are in their teens and twenties, and a youngster in the world of adults who are in their forties and fifties. Enjoy the best of both worlds. Enjoy, happy birthday.
24) Turning thirty is the moment when you are old enough to understand lifeās bigger responsibilities but young enough to shirk some of them while you still can. Happy 30th.
25) One of the most inspirational ways to usher in your thirtieth, is to face one of your fears and do something that takes away your breath. Happy birthday.
26) Twenty, thirty or forty ā how does it matter? As long as you have a positive attitude, life will always keep getting better. Happy 30th birthday.
27) Turning thirty years old is a milestone that gives you a second chance to enjoy life while you still can. Happy birthday.
28) Going to your 30th birthday party is like attending the farewell party of your youth and the welcome party of the beginning of the rest of your life. Happy 30th birthday.
29) At thirty, you are not too young nor too old. Make the most of this delightfully confused stage of life before you finally get older and weaker. Happy 30th birthday.
30) If you canāt blow up all your birthday balloons without gasping for air, good luck getting older. Happy 30th birthday.
31) The death of your youth deserves a colorful mourning. Happy 30th birthday
32) Who said you have become wise at thirty? You were already wise at twenty five but I was waiting for the right time to tell you. Happy birthday.
33) On your 30th, I want to convey my best wishes and I hope that the best job, best promotion, best holiday and best home in your life are yet come. Happy 30th birthday.
34) Your energy levels and your zest for life make me feel that you are the youngest thirty year old I have ever met. Happy birthday.
35) It does not matter whether you are thirty, thirty five or forty years old. What matters is that you are still a rebellious teenager at heart. Happy birthday.
36) Donāt let turning thirty give you the jitters ā live life to the fullest to give your heart the sweetest flutters. Happy 30th birthday.
38) You are at that juncture when the experience of your past and the ambition for your future will help you make all the right decisions in your life. Happy 30th birthday.
39) I donāt know what there to be happy about shedding off the last of your youthful years, but what the heckā¦ happy 30th birthday.
40) Donāt tell anyone that you have turned thirty otherwise everyone will start being jealous and hate you for looking so beautifully young ā as if you have just turned twenty one. Happy birthday.